A Lavish Gift (& a Perfect Gift Idea for Valentine’s Day!)

Feb

14

Posted by on Feb 14, 2017 in Advice, Beauty, Books, Marriage, Memoir, Personal | 1 comment

A Lavish Gift (& a Perfect Gift Idea for Valentine’s Day!)

  There was no way to know 35 years ago where we’d be today. Certainly not literally, but not even in a figurative sense. 12,775 days, give or take. Plenty of ups, our share of downs, and all beautiful in their time. I believe it–that everything is beautiful in time. Beauty from ashes might be the most lovely. The Heart of Marriage releases today. It’s a collection of essays about marriage, curated by my long-time blogging friend, Dawn Camp. I’m thrilled to be included in this collaboration; it’s personal. Originally Dawn and her editors were going to feature an essay I wrote on our 26th anniversary, an exploration of what love is, and isn’t, maybe best summarized in one of my favorite lines from the piece: Love usually doesn’t happen in a moment, it happens in a life. However, ultimately Dawn’s team choose another piece I offered to them, The Essence of Love. Or at least I think that’s the title they kept–I haven’t see the book yet, so I’m not 100% sure about the title. I cried when I read it again. It’s a glimpse of my in-laws’ story, a love story as rare as it is extraordinary. In it, my father-in-law offered an unexpected and provocative caution– “People want to know how we’re still so in love, how we have such a good marriage,” he began. And the next thing he said was the kind of thing pulls your attention taut, “Having a good marriage doesn’t have anything to do with trying to have a good marriage.” I hope you’re curious enough to read the rest of it; do pick up a copy of the book to read it( and so many other love-tales). I’ve heard it’s on the shelves at Barnes and Noble just in time for Valentine’s Day (and maybe your favorite local bookstore), but you can get it on sale at Amazon (affiliate link provided). OH–a bonus! In my piece for The Heart of Marriage, it begins by referencing something else I wrote; it’s best when read together. If you’re interested, please read The Essence of Love || When Love is a Pie. It’s coming up on two years since I wrote it, and what was true then is even more true today: Things are different now, and business isn’t as usual. But, still, beautiful in time…. Share...

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Helpful New Resource For Moms Who’ve Ever Lost Your Temper #TemperToolkit

Feb

02

Posted by on Feb 2, 2017 in Advice, Affiliate links used, Kids, Mom stuff, Parenting, Uncategorized | 1 comment

Helpful New Resource For Moms Who’ve Ever Lost Your Temper #TemperToolkit

    Being a mom is one of the hardest jobs on the planet.   I also believe it’s the best job on the planet, and I can say now, from where I sit as an Empty Nester, it’s beautifully, thought sometimes brutally, worthwhile and satisfying. My three children are becoming the humans I prayed and hoped they’d become, but it was not without a thousand misfires during the years they were daily under my roof. Some days I didn’t know if I would make it to the next. Some moments I didn’t know if I would make it to the next. Some seconds I didn’t know if I would let them make it to the next. Parenting isn’t easy. But we parented hard and on purpose, making the best decisions we could with what we knew. We read books and even took parenting classes at our church. Thankfully, we had a strong community of young parents walking the same road shoulder to shoulder. The internet wasn’t yet a thing when they were young, or at least not what it is today. There weren’t bloggers and websites and social networking that connected you to “experts.” For us there was Dr. Leman and Dr. Dobson, and the good parts of the Ezzos. But there were wise parents a few years ahead of me, families I could observe. When I saw older kids who seemed to behave the way I hoped mine would eventually, I took note. I watched those mamas and daddies to see if there was anything I could learn from them. They had no idea. Fast forward to now, and there’s a wealth of parenting resources out there. It’s a “chicken and bones” kind of thing – pick and choose what works for you, keep the chicken, toss those bones.  I’m excited to tell you about a new “chicken” you’re going to want to eat: The Temper Toolkit, a special parenting resource from my friend Lisa-Jo Baker. Many of you will already know Lisa-Jo as one of my (in)courage writing sisters, and as a blogger and author, she’s been encouraging moms for years (if you haven’t yet read her book, it’s a GREAT addition to a mom’s library–and on sale!). The beauty of her Temper Toolkit is she has lived this in the trenches. She’s consolidated helpful practices she’s learned over time into a video series that is sure to encourage mamas of younger children (and even those tweens and teens). There’s a reasonable price tag attached to her content; and it’s only fair to compensate her for her time in pulling this all together to make a beautiful, truly helpful resource for you.     From Lisa-Jo herself: I’ve packaged up everything I’ve learned about my mom temper (the hard way) over the last decade of parenting and everything I teach at my workshops so that you can put it into practice in your own homes. And I’m calling it The Temper Toolkit. The Temper Toolkit is a labor of love from me to you — a collection of practical strategies, honest stories, and Biblical resources from one mom to another to help you take control of your temper BEFORE you lose it.  It includes: 7 teaching videos, downloadable audio (so you can listen on the go) and key takeaways from each...

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Why I Jump

Jan

12

Posted by on Jan 12, 2017 in Uncategorized | 3 comments

It’s always surprising to me, these obscure things my brain tends to remember.   There are times I try so hard to tuck a memory in tight, to hold it close, to never forget, but I’m finding I can’t always control what sticks and what releases. My recall is as fickle as time, the way she speeds up the things we want to linger, and inches along those thing we want to hurry. I see this with books a lot. A turn of phrase will settle in deep; the perfect adjective in the hands of the best author makes special what most writers would leave bland, tasteless. It’s why adults love Harry Potter. Rowling isn’t just a children’s storyteller–she’s magical. Years ago I read “Same Kind of Different As Me.” At its core it is a love story, the kind birthed in tragedy, lived in fragility, and told with sincerity. It’s based on a true story, a tale of unlikely friendship, and though there’s plenty to find fault with, there’s one thing that has remained with me eight years after reading. Deborah’s attitude. Mostly people consider it a friendship tale between her husband, Ron Hall, and a man they meet at a homeless shelter, Denver Moore, but Deborah was the catalyst for all that came later. Her determination and moxie were inspiring. Deborah battled cancer like a warrior. She didn’t live in denial. She celebrated “what is,” not “what might be.” She understood life is precious, each day a gift.   There was a point in her illness when she and Ron would begin their days with a declaration of what they knew for that moment– We’re alive! We’re alive. I’m alive. I’m not battling cancer, but there are days I’d rather not face, circumstances that challenge all I know. Whenever I wake up with any type of destructive thought or dread for the day, I find myself echoing Deborah’s words– I’m alive!   This day is all I’m promised, this moment is all I know with complete certainty I’ve got. Indeed, it is reason to praise God. It is motive enough to celebrate every moment.   I think this is why I love princess dresses and joy-jumping: They’re outward expressions of this inner declaration: I. AM. ALIVE! When despair or defeat threaten to creep into your soul, scream that back at ’em. They’re trying to kill the best parts of you, but I’m convinced when we remember Whose we are and who we are, we stand a fighting chance.   ***   The image above is taken at my local Barnes and Noble, where I first saw copies of Craving Connections: 30 Challenges for Real Life Engagement on the shelf. I’m thrilled to have a chapter included, one that covers 20 years of my life and the people who impacted me along the way. As part of its promotion, book elves are sneaking Starbucks gift certificates in stores all over the country, and also autographing copies. If you aren’t familiar, please check out the book’s site to learn more. Also? If you’re one of the lucky ducks who’ll be at the Atlanta Market this week, DaySpring is giving away free books to everyone who stops by our booth. Co-author Dawn Camp and I will be there to sign copies, and play cheerleaders for a wonderful book celebrating community, and what it...

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C-L-E-M-S-O-N T-I-G-E-R-S!

Jan

10

Posted by on Jan 10, 2017 in Uncategorized | 4 comments

C-L-E-M-S-O-N T-I-G-E-R-S!

  A year ago I celebrated the reasons Clemson remained #1 to me, despite a hard-fought loss to Alabama for the National Championship. Tonight they tamed the Crimson Tide in a stunning come-from-behind victory. What a day…what a season…!   Share...

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Presents or Presence (The Difference in Listening Well)

Dec

24

Posted by on Dec 24, 2016 in (in)courage, Advice, Christmas, Faith, Family, Friends, Service to others | 0 comments

Presents or Presence (The Difference in Listening Well)

“For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son.” (John 3:16)   You can’t fool her, you know. Two pudgy hands cup your cheeks to turn your face, demanding your eyes look deep into her own. “Mama, you’re not listening!” You can almost feel her heart stomping its tiny imaginary foot to accentuate the point. Of course, you’re right when you insist, “Yes I am, honey, I can just do two things at once.” You did hear her, after all. But she’s right (more right?) because you weren’t listening. Hearing requires only ears. Listening demands ears, eyes, mind, and maybe most important, heart. The difference matters. A lot. Here’s why: Your children don’t just notice the difference between hearing and listening, they understand the difference: Something else is more important than them in that moment. O u c h! This isn’t confined to children; don’t we all hate it when we know someone is only half engaged in conversation? Present in body but absent in thought? I grow weary from all the admonitions to focus on Christ during the Christmas season, to resist holiday busyness. Please don’t get me wrong — I agree — but then I see a believing people tangled and lifeless in sticky-webs of shopping, baking, parties, and school or church programs. We are distracted. Everyone is working extra hard to pay for All The Things. And though our homes have never looked more lovely or smelled more delicious . . . Our actions are speaking loudly, and they don’t always match up to our words. Can I get an “Amen!”?   Please click to continue reading Presents/Presence for incourage. Promise: if you’ll follow this friendly advice this Christmas season, you’ll be  giving and receiving something precious. Share...

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Craving Connection Book {Order before December 15th & get a second free!}

Dec

09

Posted by on Dec 9, 2016 in (in)courage, Book Review, Books, Encouragement, Personal, Uncategorized, Writing | 0 comments

Craving Connection Book {Order before December 15th & get a second free!}

  A year or so ago an opportunity was presented to me that sounded intriguing: submit a chapter for a collaborative work published by incourage in partnership with Lifeway. This first book project by incourage was to be all about community, its tagline, 30 challenges for real life engagement. Other than that, I knew my chapter was to be based on John 15:12-17 and needed to be between 2,000-2,500 words. It was an easy “yes” and sounded like fun. When I sat down to write I wasn’t sure what to share, but once I put pen to paper, 20 years of my life poured out. Amazing how you can squeeze over 7,000 days into 2,500 words.   A few weeks ago I received an early copy and joined a small group of people who agreed to read the daily chapters and take part in one (or all) of the challenges associated with each piece. Well. I don’t know exactly what I expected, but friends, I’m here to tell you, it exceeded whatever expectation I had! Day after day I was encouraged. Just about every chapter was something I could personally relate to. The material was accessible and inspiring, and I was so glad and grateful to be a part of such a solid, God-glorifying collaboration. It was a blessing to be with two dear friends when my copy arrived. God love ’em, they let me read my chapter out loud to them. Because it had been so long since I submitted my piece, and I had never read it aloud – essentially “hearing” it for the first time – I was surprised that it moved me to tears. I mean, it’s not like I wasn’t familiar with the material. In any event, Craving Connections releases in hardback on January 10, 2017. It’s available for pre-order now, and if you order by December 15th, you get a second copy free along with a few other fun incentives.    Of course, I hope you’ll support this work (because I KNOW you’ll come away encouraged!), and if you do, please DO share your thoughts with me! I reallyreallyreally want to hear! Share...

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#GivingTuesday – When it’s personal (a must-read no matter when you see this)

Nov

29

Posted by on Nov 29, 2016 in Family, Gratitude, Mom stuff, Mothers and daughters, Personal, Uncategorized | 2 comments

#GivingTuesday – When it’s personal (a must-read no matter when you see this)

She had no idea what her words were doing to me that night. My heart was growing like the Grinch’s when he finally understood the mystery and beauty of Christmas.   Which I realize, as I tell this tale,  is essentially about the same thing: Giving. Because isn’t Christmas rooted in giving? It’s about how a great, great God extended lavish grace to an undeserving world and gave love in human form, a way back to him.  The Way back to him. Love incarnate. Jesus. And in our car that night illuminated by freeway lights, she was the most luminous thing of all, her countenance aglow. I didn’t even have to look at her. You could feel her light. His light in her. We had three hours on our drive home and she filled time and space with stories of her work. They poured out, water from a hydrant, quenching our desire to know more, to better understand. She was the one on fire. What my heart doing- growing – was greater joy, John tells me so. I believe him. She wasn’t talking about what you should do to change the world around you, she was telling us about all she’s done. We know what she likely doesn’t:  She’s changing the world. All of them are, these co-laborers for a cause. There are many on either side of her, arms linked, stepping into hard places and leaving footprints. Sometimes literally. She’s a college graduate who accepted a two-year fellowship working with poverty elimination. She’s a college graduate who accepted a two-year fellowship where she has to raise her own salary, which happens to be as it were, below the poverty level. I did the math and it broke my heart. But not hers. She hasn’t even noticed. She doesn’t understand how little she makes because as she looks around, she’s just like everyone else in her world. The one she’s changing. And of course she has parents who can stand in the gap for anything she needs, and she knows better than me, the people she serves don’t have that luxury. So, if you’re thinking about year-end giving or inspired by this day known as Giving Tuesday, and you haven’t already promised your hard-earned dollars to your own personal cause, I’m asking you to give to Cross Purpose, and I’m bold enough to add, as much as you can.   (If you’d like to give specifically to Rachel, be sure to add “To the ministry of Rachel Dance” in the notes section, but however you choose to give WILL make a difference in the lives of those earnestly taking the steps to walk out of poverty.) Cross Purpose is a non-profit and seeks: “to abolish relational, economic, and spiritual poverty through the power of redemptive relationships. CrossPurpose is a nonprofit ministry dedicated to the idea of neighborhoods without poverty.” The world my daughter is helping to change specifically focuses on nine poor neighborhoods in Denver, CO. The way Cross Purpose is going about poverty elimination is revolutionary, and other organizations around the country are studying their model to learn more. Cross Purpose esteems and empowers the people they’re hoping to help; they do not consider them human projects to pity. Rachel has just begun the second year of her fellowship and she still needs partners interested in investing in this special ministry. If...

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Love at the Table {a tribute for Grace Table}

Nov

20

Posted by on Nov 20, 2016 in Family, Family Traditions, Grace Table, Uncategorized | 1 comment

Love at the Table {a tribute for Grace Table}

I still remember the first time I met her, emerging from the shadow of her garage to meet us at the car. Her eyes were the same piercing blue as his; or rather, I suppose, his, hers. I think I told her so right then. I don’t know if he and I were in love yet but we were headed in that direction. He brought me home to meet his parents, after all; obviously, something was simmering. Three decades are sandwiched between then and now but I can still recall two things about that weekend: initial introductions and Sunday lunch. A college sophomore subsisting on starchy dining hall fare, I had come to deeply appreciate home cooking. It was a thing a kid takes for granted if they’re fortunate enough to have a family that gathers for dinner more often than not (I was one of the lucky ones). Sarah’s table was beautiful, set with Haviland china, sterling, and crystal. Platters and bowls full of comfort covered every square inch. Everything looked – and smelled – delicious. It wouldn’t take long to find out every dish delivered what it promised. I wasn’t shy about helping myself to seconds, and Sarah declared how glad she was for her son to bring home a girl who would eat. I was a little embarrassed at her observation, but I took it as the sincere compliment she intended. That was the first of dozens (hundreds?) of  meals I’d enjoy around my in-law’s table. Sarah’s recipes account for a substantial portion of my own culinary arsenal. Her fried chicken is magical, her sour cream pound cake might well be the best in the world, and Thanksgiving isn’t the same without her dressing. Her hand-pressed butter mints are magical. Sarah’s life has preached hospitality without her ever needing to say a word; she’s a There you are! person from the moment you step through her door. Around her table, there’s always room for one more. Her whole life has been an offering poured out in service to others, most often through her oven. She has always understood that something special happens when family and friends gather ’round a table. Frequently using her china taught me not to wait to use my own. Sarah recognized that extraordinary moments are found within our ordinary days. But with Thanksgiving next week and Christmas just around the corner, I’m acutely aware how life has changed…. * * *  I hope you’ll click to complete reading Love at The Table over at Grace Table. Grab tissues…. Share...

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If / Then

Nov

13

Posted by on Nov 13, 2016 in Faith, Scripture Link | 1 comment

If / Then

If believers will: humble ourselves pray seek God repent then God will: hear forgive our sin heal our land 2 Chronicles 7:14, a promise with condition, seeds hope for the faithful.   Share...

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The Broken Way, Ann Voskamp’s newest releases Tuesday. Order TODAY & you’ll get extras!

Oct

24

Posted by on Oct 24, 2016 in Uncategorized | 0 comments

The Broken Way, Ann Voskamp’s newest releases Tuesday. Order TODAY & you’ll get extras!

  Friends, if you loved 1000 Gifts or/and you’re a fan of Ann Voskamp’s writing, she’s giving away a pile of freebies if you pre-order her new release, The Broken Way, by TONIGHT. Buy three (or more) copies, and you’ll be entered to travel with Ann to Africa “in a life-changing, empty-bucket list kind of trip.” I bought three :). Although the book releases tomorrow, I received an advanced copy. It’s digital, though, and I’m a slow reader if I can’t flip paper pages. If you’ve read any of Ann’s lyrical prose, you might understand how some people would have a hard time not being able to underline, star, highlight, heart, exclamation point, and smiley face a lot of those paper pages. It’s not only beautiful (so far), it’s affecting – soul and heart – and I can’t wait to get a hard copy for a proper read. Anyways, tout de suite! Grab your copies today; then let Ann know so you can take advantage of those bonuses. Share...

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