Returning from vacation means two things: a mountain of dirty laundry and an empty pantry and fridge. By yesterday, the laundry pile was reduced to a molehill, so it was time to head to Wal-Mart for groceries.
I don’t know about where you live, but here, Wal-Mart is a gathering place; as gargantuan as the store is, regardless of the time of day, chances are I’ll run into someone I know. Forget to brush my hair, fail to put on make-up, or walk out the door with a coffee-stained shirt? Those chances are tripled.
After running into a few familiar faces and filling my shopping cart along the way, it was time to check out. There were a half-dozen "20 items or less" aisles open, so I shuffled to one of the three that had no limit; the "short" line with only two women in front of me.
{insert hysterical laugh} Who was I kidding? "Short" line means NOTHING once I choose it!
I picked up People Magazine and read the entire issue–I know more about Anne Hathaway’s former Italian lover/conman/jailbird and Chris Evert’s and Greg Norman’s wedding than I really care to. MAINLY BECAUSE I HAD ICE CREAM AND FROZEN PIZZAS THAT NEEDED TO GET HOME BEFORE THEY THAWED AND MELTED!
I was stuck, two people had wedged in behind me. OF COURSE a line opened up to the left! The lady behind me took advantage but I was still boxed in (and for the record, after 20 minutes–I’M NOT EXAGGERATING!–the cashier was still ringing the first lady’s groceries!).
It was my good fortune that I knew the lady behind her–Chef Melanie from Fresh Market cooking demos :). Since I stalk her take advantage of these free mini-classes as often as possible, she recognized me. We were enjoying a nice little chat when I heard the cashier calling out to us, "Honey, I’m going on break when I’m done with these two…" and I noticed her light was off (it hadn’t been before), and I involuntarily whined "BUT WE’VE BEEN IN LINE HALF AN HOUR!". Seriously…I sounded like a three-year old; I wasn’t proud, it just self-blurted.
She VERY nicely replied, "Oh, I didn’t realize…I’ll finish with y’all…" and that’s when Melanie noticed an aisle to our right opening. She directed me to go in front of her, and because MY ICE CREAM WAS NOW A MILK SHAKE AND THE PIZZAS WERE ALMOST READY TO EAT, I didn’t protest. Much. Grocery Karma was in her favor, though, and ANOTHER line opened and she hopped in front.
Unbelievable, and bless her heart, but my stash was bagged before the original cashier had finished with those other two ladies. Yes, bless her heart.
Oh, dear…there’s a "Part Two" to the black cloud that followed me yesterday, think I’ll make that another post…I DO SO have that knack for s t r e t c h i n g out a story, huh?
To be continued….
Glad it isn’t just my Wal Mart that always has lines. I am also one that always picks the wrong line. Hope you salvaged your pizza and ice cream.
Two rules never fail me at the grocery store.
1. the cart I pick will be handicapped – someone hit it in the parking lot with their car or a huge family has over-loaded it one too many times, but it never fails; if I choose it, one of the wheels will not go around.
2. regardless of what was going on in a line before I joined it, my presence will cause the register tape to run out, the person in front of me to have chosen an unmarked item, or their debit card will be declined and they don’t have another one.
I’m a menace.
I’ve actually stood for 30 mins in the EXPRESS lane on a Saturday at noon. You can bet your melted ice cream sandwiches that I was on the phone to the manager before I left the store. (On the phone because I was late for a gathering due to that wait; otherwise I would have made it face-to-face.) I recommended that they either retrain some employees or schedule workers to be present on their busiest days or else I would take my business to other places that can help me at a better pace. Oh, and of course a line opened up about 28 minutes into the wait and those behind me did not give us the opportunity to go through first. I let him know about that too.
Hope you made it home not completely melted/thawed and able to enjoy some of those goodies in peace. I have a feeling the answer was no with the way you ended the post…
Eating ice cream WHILE doing laundry almost makes it tolerable. 😉 One carton per spin cycle.
I always pick the slowest line, too. And, yes, Wal-mart is the heart of my social life! 😉
A long becomes handicapped the minute I get in it. And what IS IT with Wal-Mart and the lines anyway? My husband complains about checkers not being able to speak English these days. I’m happy if they don’t say a word, as long as they can whip those items over the scanner in a reasonable amount of time. I hope your ice cream and pizza is no worse for the wear.
Slow cashiers are a torture for me. I worked extensively as a cashier before I was married so I know what it’s like. And you know what? It can be done quickly! It’s so irksome for me to see a cashier pick up one item, scan it with a handheld hand scanner, put down the scanner, bag the item, pick up the scanner and repeat. It’s like these people don’t realize that it can be done faster. Or maybe they just don’t care. BUT
Last week when I was visiting my parents in SmallTown Canada we went to their newish Walmart. Let me tell you the cashier was FAST. It was a man and boy did he know how to get people through. They have a 10 item or less set up I’ve not seen in these parts – everyone gets in line for one of about 6 cash registers…and an automated voice tells the next person in line which cash register to high tail it to as soon as the cashier is finished with a customer. There were a lot of folks ahead of me on a Fri afternoon and it went fast. Except when the man in front of me decided to continue his conversation with a pal in the next line and I had to wait til they called him 2x before he got moving…I was about to say something.
Anyway it’s a pet peeve of mine as you can tell.
We just got home late Sat night so I know all too well about the pile of laundry and empty fridge (with sour milk – ugh).
This is sooooo me at Walmart. I quit going and just accepted what my local grocer has to offer. It’s not much but the customer service is unbelievable – they always remember that I want PAPER! How ’bout that.
30 minutes? And here I complain if its more than 10. LOL. See good deeds are always rewarded as your friend has shown! Not always quite so quickly, but always! Now down here we would have made them go and replace the icecream for us! Afterall, you were not after a milk shake were you?
Apparently (so my daughter beccy tells me) if you work in a Lidl store (which we have here but I don’t really use that often) the cashiers are timed. If they don’t perform efficiently they loose their jobs. We used one of these stores in Portugal and until beccy told me this I couldn’t understand why the girl was throwing things through the scanner so quickly. Maybe Walmart should try this!!
I am waiting to see what happened to the pizza and ice cream. Pepperoni Milkshakes. I feel bad haiku coming on. Gotta go. I might write something I regret. LOL.
I do believe that is what Seinfeld calls the fast lane.
I got stuck in a Wal-Mart line today. The woman in front of me was arguing about the price of the purse she wanted, while the lady behind me and I rolled our eyes. I was only able to read the front cover of the Anne Hathaway feature story, plus the pictures of all the famous women w/o makeup, and the celebrities who look pregnant but no one is certain. I’m sure you know exactly what I’m talking about.
All good stories deserve to be stretched out. :>)
I despise Wal-Mart but have been there twice in the last two days. Arrrrrrg.
Wal-Mart…the lines are bad, but when the cashier puts a single item in each bag – THAT stretches out the excursion.
I laughed all the way through this because it’s so true – a definite “been there, done that” moment for me. Just early this morning I had to run out to the end of our driveway and would you believe BOTH my neighbours on either side were out!!! My hair wasn’t combed, no make-up on. What were they doing out there at this hour???
Your Wal-Mart story is hilarious! Can’t wait to read Part 2!
Thanks for the smile!
Joy
Um – considering that you live in the South, I am not surprised by the fact you were in line so long. Not that I’m bad-mouthing the South, but when I was down there everything seemed to be as slow as molasses.