I don't see it coming when it happens–
Time plays tricks on me.
The catalyst? My children, a l w a y s m y b a b i e s.
Sometimes when I'm looking at them, watching them,
when all of me is s t i l l enough,
I go back in time and see who they were—
their younger self, the toddler, the preschooler…
the age they were when they needed me to wipe their behind
or tie their shoes or brush their hair
and a thousand other "or's."
Or I see a future flash, who they're becoming—
their dreams, their hopes,
their p o t e n t i a l realized.
There's a quiet desperation for life long, not for the sake of myself, but to meet the adult version of my babies, to kiss my babies' babies, to read more of their life stories.
Is this the essence of motherhood, a slow dying in the midst of all things new?
Of course, my head knows what my heart was slower to receive: they aren't babies anymore. I have to look up to see into their eyes for goodness sakes.
I've given up chasing Neverland. I know that's the stuff of dreams and imagination and I'm good with it. It's the natural order and how things should be, right?
But when I'm still, there is reward:
I see them fully.
I see their complexity, their metamorphosis; their beauty, and yes, sometimes their ugly. I know them as well as anyone can, as deeply as they're willing to let me in.
Don't we all long to be fully known (and loved) regardless of complexity and imperfection?
Of this, I'm convinced:
The way a mother knows and loves her child is seeded in the Divine.
Be still, and know that I am God the scripture tells me.
Be still, and know…a command.
Be still, and know…whisper and admonition.
Be still, and know…because I need to be reminded that being still enables me to know.
Does it not confound you that God wants to be known, and he doesn't leave the how a secret?
Why is it my tendancy is to avoid being still? Why do I (we?) equate busyness with success or productivity or validation? And maybe I (we) would say that's not true but doesn't the evidence shout otherwise?
We are an easily distractable lot, we American consumers. Shiny trinkets clamor for attention, and we too often settle for better when best patiently waits.
And during a season when I'm already thinking on these things, when that hushed whisper Be still…stop striving is sounded in my heart, I receive a message from my friend Lisa Leonard, and she's created something new and beautiful and she asks me to choose one.
The truth is, I want them all (American Consumer much?) because I love the entire Lisa Leonard Faith Collection…but there was no doubt which one I should choose….
How much fun is the juxtaposition–and the on-the-surface contradiction–of my One Word for 2012 bracelet (by the beautiful Lisa Lehmann, aka the Bead Girl) with this needed reminder?
Wearing these meaning-filled words helps me practice the discipline of stillness; they help me remember what my squirrely soul too often forgets.
Do you need help remembering?
Would you like to win Lisa's Be Still and Know Bracelet?
I'll make it easy. Simply leave a comment on this post that somehow demonstrates you actually read it ~ smile ~. After you do that, enter as often as you like by leaving a separate comment letting me know you've done any of the following:
- Subscribe to PENSIEVE by email or in a reader(already a subscriber? THANK YOU! Just let me know in a comment, too.)
- Tweet this post with a mention for the Lisa Leonard/Heartfelt giveaway (commenting the URL of your tweet is sufficient). Use your own words or cut and paste:
A heartfelt post by @PensieveRobin on #motherhood #parenting & being still + a @LisaLeonard #giveaway http://bit.ly/RyczyR
Beautiful, MUST-read by @PensieveRobin on #motherhood #parenting & being still + a @LisaLeonard #giveaway http://bit.ly/RyczyR
"Is this the essence of motherhood, a slow dying in the midst of all things new?" by @PensieveRobin http://bit.ly/RyczyR (GO~READ~NOW)
"The way a mother knows and loves her child is seeded in the Divine." Love! great read by @PensieveRobin http://bit.ly/RyczyR
(ummm, just tryin' to mix up the tweets so they aren't all the same 🙂 )
- Shared on Facebook (a link to your share, please).
- On my right sidebar, click "Like" for my Facebook page.
Winner will be randomly selected but I'll make sure the number chosen followed entry guildlines. I'm a stickler on this. Prize mailed to US only. Entry deadline is Saturday, September 8th at midnight EST.
I've already bought three more pieces for gifts from the Lisa Leonard Faith Collection; and if you see something you'd like, I encourage you to take advantage of 15% off the entire collection with the code LLD15 (good through 9/15/12). Orders over $50 receive free shipping, too.