There’s this scene in the 1980s version of About Last Night where Demi Moore’s character, Debbie, is rebuffing her former lover’s (and boss’s) advances. Steve’s a persistent one, not believing her first “no” and reminding her of what they once shared. Her response is angry…indignant, not so much at his uninvited gesture but because he can’t see “it,” her feelings for her current boyfriend.
Debbie: There’s somebody else now.
Steve: I don’t see a ring.
Debbie: I don’t need a ring…. Look at me. Don’t I look different? I’m in love, can’t you tell? This has never happened to me before. I want to have ten kids with this guy…doesn’t it show?
The scene strongly resonates with me though under different circumstances. I’ve felt a similar emotional tension, markers of something significant.
After I got married…
After giving birth to my first child…
When we’re young, we think there’s a point at which we’re grown. What I’ve come to realize is as long as we’re alive, we never stop growing, at least not in the ways that matter most. In the beginning, we celebrate a series of Firsts. Somewhere beyond the crest of the Hill we celebrate lasts.
Sometimes endings and beginnings are one in the same, the point of view and beauty therein lies in their beholder.
My youngest and I shared a dual ending/beginning, and it hit me he’s not the only one coming of age. So am I.
His departure ushers in a new season for me and I find myself wanting to scream
Look at me! Don’t I look different? This has never happened to me before!
I didn’t expect to feel different, but I do. Nothing has changed and yet everything has changed.
Everything that happens
has happened before,
and all that will be
has already been—
God does everything
over and over again.
~ Ecclesiastes 3:15 CEV
Sometimes all I need to talk me off the ledge are Ancient Words.
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PLEASE check back as I continue this series, as I process this new and precious life season. Though I feel it deeply, and at times, painfully so, there is too much good about it I don’t want you to miss! It’s easy to subscribe for free, so if you haven’t yet, consider this my personal invitation. (Also, if you haven’t yet, please read the first post in this series.)