{{I'm at it again–be sure to click "The Stuff of Dreams and Nightmares" for MORE pictures of spiders in webs ~ Argiope aka writing spiders aka garden spiders.}}

 

It is pure joy to my person when one of my children excitedly runs into the house and with great enthusiasm spouts, "IF YOU WANNA TAKE A PICTURE OF THE CRAZY-BIGGEST SPIDER I'VE EVER SEEN, GET YOUR CAMERA–NOW!!!".

Nothin' says "I love you, Mama" like them knowing what makes my heart flit and flutter, even when it's of the arachnid variety.  If you searched my blog (hmmm, I DO want one of those little search boxes…suggestions?) or if you're a long-time reader, you already know I have a macabre fascination with spiders and snakes and creepy crawlers of every flavor.  Mice and rats are another story.  And roaches.  THOSE are the bane of my existence.  When I get to heaven, God has some 'splainin' to do. 

But I digress.

Really, truly, with GREAT (albeit, rather questionable) pleasure, I bring you Charlotte and her web–

Charlotte

But wait!  That's her underbelly and the center of her web obscured a "good" view.  OF COURSE, I had to walk around to the other side, wade through waist-high bushes and photograph her dead on.

Writing_spider

Aren't writing spiders amazing??  Why do they do that little zig-zag stitch?  Is it for aesthetics?  Strengthening their web?  And why only in one place?

Writing_spider_in_web

I wasn't stuck in her web, but she held me captive.  Can someone PLEASE explain to me why I will get inches away from all manner of insects, etc., when I'm behind a camera lens?  This makes no sense to me.  If I happened upon her the way Thomas did–chasing a basketball and almost falling into her web–I'd be screamin' like a girl.  They woulda heard me three counties over.

But…nooooo!  I just kept taking pictures, fiddlin' with the settings on my SLR. 

Writing_spider_in_her_web

The photo shoot apparently wore Miss Charlotte OUT and stirred up quite an appetite (either that or she was giving fair warning to me if I got any closer).  She curled around her innocent victim and I'm pretty sure proceeded to suck his brains out. 

 Writing_spider_eating_prey

Which was such a thing of wonder, she had me waxing poetic.  Let's close on Mary Howitt's classic tale (and oft mis-quoted) verse, The Spider and the Fly.

Will you walk into my parlour? said the spider to the fly.
Tis the prettiest little parlour that ever you did spy,
The way into my parlour is up a winding stair,
And I've a many curious things to shew when you are there.

Oh no, no, said the little Fly, to ask me is in vain,
For who goes up your winding stair, can ne'er come down again.
I'm sure you must be weary, dear, with soaring up so high
Will you rest upon my little bed? said the Spider to the Fly.

There are pretty curtains drawn around; the sheets are fine and thin,
And if you like to rest awhile, I'll snugly tuck you in!
Oh no, no, said the little Fly, for I've often heard it said
They never, never wake again, who sleep upon your bed!

Said the cunning Spider to the Fly, Dear friend what can I do,
To prove the warm affection I 've always felt for you?
I have within my pantry, good store of all that's nice
I'm sure you're very welcome, will you please to take a slice?

Oh no, no, said the little Fly, Kind Sir, that cannot be,
I've heard what's in your pantry, and I do not wish to see!
Sweet creature! said the Spider, you're witty and you're wise,
How handsome are your gauzy wings, how brilliant are your eyes!

I've a little looking-glass upon my parlour shelf,
If you'll step in one moment, dear, you shall behold yourself.
I thank you, gentle sir, she said, for what you 're pleased to say,
And bidding you good morning now, I'll call another day.

The Spider turned him round about, and went into his den,
For well he knew the silly Fly would soon come back again
So he wove a subtle web, in a little corner sly,
And set his table ready, to dine upon the Fly.

Then he came out to his door again, and merrily did sing,
Come hither, hither, pretty Fly, with the pearl and silver wing,
Your robes are green and purple, there's a crest upon your head
Your eyes are like the diamond bright, but mine are dull as lead!

Alas, alas! How very soon this silly little Fly,
Hearing his wily, flattering words, came slowly flitting by
With buzzing wings she hung aloft, then near and nearer drew,
Thinking only of her brilliant eyes, and green and purple hue

Thinking only of her crested head, poor foolish thing!
At last, Up jumped the cunning Spider, and fiercely held her fast.
He dragged her up his winding stair, into his dismal den,
Within his little parlour, but she ne'er came out again!

And now dear little children, who may this story read,
To idle, silly flattering words, I pray you ne'er give heed.
Unto an evil counsellor, close heart and ear and eye,
And take a lesson from this tale, of the Spider and the Fly.

 

Oh–I almost forgot:  Carmi's (Written Inc.) theme for this week's Thematic Photographic is "nature".  How kind of him to select one that so perfectly suits yesterday's photoshoot!   Click here for details.

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